First off I want to say that I have nothing against Mercury vehicles.I don't even have a car.and if someone offered me a mercury at a good price i'de prolly cop one.for free??? shit you know im taking that and throwing "whatchu rollin' on!!??" in the cd player (i mean ipod into built in mp3 player capabilities..so sorry) and rolling down the street two miles an hour so everybody sees me...theres a couple of things that urk me about the campaign they have been running for the past couple of years though...
If you watch tv like i do (way too much) and watch and pay attention to the commercials like i do (waaaaaayyyyy too much) you will know of the woman i am speaking of that they use to market their vehicles lately.
ok yo...heres the deal....that chick is totally fuckable....but look what the fuck shes wearing man...they put her in these totally unattractive boring ass slacks and sweater that make it so you can't see her figure at all....this doesnt make me wanna buy the car it makes me wanna call up the co. and tell them to put that bitch in some clothes where i can see her legs,ass and see some of that cleavage at the very least..throw that bitch in a mini skirt....she totally doesnt look good man.she is dressed like a teacher..and not one im hot for...one that gives me too much fucking homework.if ya gonna have a hot bitch sell ya car make her look like i wanna bring her in the backseat and stick my dick in her.otherwise...at least for me it just is an annoyance to watch the commercial in the first place.
ok now aside from the bitch dressed like frasier's wife in cheers,the other thing that is just a bad look as far as im concerned is the slogan "you gotta put mercury on your list"
I gotta put them on my list??? why?? what if i dont motherfucker? what if this is my list:
Lambo
Phantom
subaru
volvo
volvubaru (watch son ima make that happen when i git that first million in the bank..west coast customs will be getting a call from me shortly.ima all about pimping safety on the road.)
Hummer (not the truck...the hummer ide wanna git from that hoe in the backseat if she didnt look like she was wearing her metrosexual boyfriends clothes)
"you gotta put mercury on your list"
doesnt that sound kind of desperate?like as if mercury is the equivalent of the crazy uncle in ya family that you don't wanna invite to ya family gathering because he's always creeped you the fuck out and now it has trickled down to creeping your kids out but he changed ya diaper once when you were a baby and your mother would be furious if she found out you excluded him from participating in a family get together because however nutty he may be and even though he has hair growing out his ears hes her brother..even though he was annoying as fuck and made funny noises with his nasal passage and gave you wierd looks n shit and he will probably make everyone at the party feel uncomfortable making rude and awkward comments about people in your family living or dead all night he IS part of the family so your wife tells you "honey...you gotta put crazy old uncle Leo on your list"
Fuck that...Duke is not invited and im getting me a hummer......in the back of a phantom.at the dealership..cause i wont be throwing cash down on that no time soon even with a FEW mill in the bank...im buying the volvo and subaru and getting on the phone with west coast customs.
VROOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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